1. |
Spunk Patrol
05:27
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SPUNK PATROL (Words and Music - Robert Childs)
My name is Samantha
I live in a slum
I play with my panther
But it's not much fun
My friend Lady Mary and I
We go to the pool
We lie there half naked
And try to act cool
Spunk Patrol
Spunk Patrol
Spunk Patrol
Spunk Patrol
I don't like whackers
I don't like punks
I'm only happy
When I'm looking for spunks
Adrian's lovely
With powerful thighs
Wayne hypnotises
With his chocolate eyes
Clarissa's a tart, though
The way she hangs out
We know what she's doing
She leaves little doubt
Spunk Patrol ... looking for spunks
We went to the disco
The music so loud
Barry was loathsome
He danced with a cow
Darryl danced with me
And late in the night
He touched me so gently
And said I was tight
Spunk Patrol ... looking for spunks
Spunk Patrol
Spunk Patrol
Spunk Patrol
Spunk Patrol ...
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2. |
Sugar Addict
04:47
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SUGAR ADDICT (Words and Music - Robert Childs)
In the night I lie awake
With this uncontrollable desire
In the night I feel the ache
My belly burning fire
In the night I feel the pain
Chewing at my inner core
In the night I'm unrestrained
Crucifed at the kitchen door
Sweeten me
Sweeten me
Sweeten me
Sweeten me
I'm a sugar addict
I'm a sugar addict
I'm a sugar addict
Too far gone to care
In the day I feel the same
I sit and feed my want
Sugar goddess, syrup queen
I worship at your font
High priest of sweetness help me
Satisfy this emptiness
Light my candle, burn my wick
Smell the sweet smell of excess
Sweeten me ...
I'm a sugar addict ...
Too far gone to redeem
Come to me candyman
Let me kiss your honey lips
Sacrifice my body turning
Like a pig upon a spit
Let me suck your sugarcane
As you spray me with your soda pop
Squirt your nectar down my throat
It's impossible to stop
Sweeten me ...
I'm a sugar addict ...
too far gone to save
My life is meaningless
Without my sugar fix
Mainlining in my veins
My holy grail my phoenix
My life is an endless chain
From jelly bean to jujube
In despair and in decay
Resurrected by a sugar cube
Sweeten me
Sweeten me
Sweeten me
Sweeten me
I'm a sugar addict
I'm a sugar addict
I'm a sugar addict
Too far gone to scare
Sweeten me
Sweeten me
Sweeten me
Sweeten me
I'm a sugar addict
I'm a sugar addict
I'm a sugar addict
Too far gone to fear
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3. |
Americana
03:14
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AMERICANA (Words and Music - Robert Childs)
Intro:
There's our children gaggling at the corner
Faces fixed, their futures glow so bright
Clutching spray cans, pens and permanent markers
You might ask them what their game is
Colouring in a picture of the stars and stripes
Graffiti vandals tag upon our heritage
Their symbols meaningless, their idiotic verbiage
Splashed along the roads, slashed across the landscape
Is it any wonder from the culture they ape?
Chorus:
Americana/A double burger with a sesame bun
Americana/Apple pie, a coke and fries, guaranteed in 30 seconds
Americana/Take away or stay if you can find a seat
From Disneyland to Rundle Street
The tawdry giveaways, inanities and crass cliches
The gaudy colours that they flash in arrogant display
The scrawled absurdities around the car park
Who can wipe the stain of that indelible mark?
Chorus:
Bridge:
What's the legacy we leave our children?
What's the future we bequeath to them?
How will history judge our unique story?
Will it be a splendid vision which
Some clown's defaced with a yellow M?
I watched the service televised on National 9
Embalmed in styrofoam, cremated on prime time
Our identity wrapped in bread
And the epitaph on the neon tombstone read:
Chorus:
Niagara Falls to Rundle Street
From Oklahoma to Rundle Street
From Central Park to Rundle Street
From Hollywood Hilton to Rundle Street
From Disneyworld to Rundle Street
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4. |
||||
FOLDING MY WAY TO THE MOON
(Words and Music - Robert Childs)
If I had a piece of paper
And folded it 40 times
It'd stretch past the moon
What an incredible climb
A simple piece of paper
Just think of the money we'd save
Such a simple solution
In this high technology space age
Chorus
Folding my way to the moon
Folding my way to the moon
I could try for the stars in the sky
But my ambitions never reach that high
Give me a cool and starless night
On some natural satellite
I could sing off key
And play almost in tune
Folding my way to the moon
I've seen other planets
Other worlds and asteroids
I can't pretend I know them all
But some of them I'd avoid
On some it's what you own
Others it's what you seem
I just do whatever I can
And dream my possible dream
Chorus
Some people find excuses
Recriminations and regrets
But the world still spins around
And the sun still sets
So I take a piece of paper
And try another rhyme
Pluck up another melody
And store them up for folding time
If you never try it
You'll never know what it's like
To be a paper mountaineer
Having the fold of your life
Chorus
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5. |
Tree
04:37
|
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TREE (Words and Music - Robert Childs)
Tree
You've offended the rules of the time
You've grown too close to that great power line
And your roots have grown down and invaded the earth
And now the people are saying that that's more than you're worth
They'll lop you and chop you and bend you to their ends
And if they're not satisfied they'll start it all again
They did it to me, in fact they still do
They did it to me and they'll do it to you
Tree
You've offended the people again
You've grown out of control and extended a limb
Too high for their ladders, too close to their homes
And now you're dropping your leaves on their gutta percha gnomes
They'll bring on their axes, bulldozers, chainsaws
They'll rip you and chip you and clip you to your core
Remove you from the highways for the great motor car
And if they can't kill you that way they'll try phytophthora
Tree
Were there really so many of you
And did the people really have such a clear view
Now you stand here solitary and bare
The wind buts your limbs the people just stare
Petty individuals collectively small
Decide you've become uneconomical
Tree
They're united in fearing you most
I suppose you can see that it's their kind of growth
Tree
You've offended the rules of the time
You've grown too close to that great power line
And your roots have grown down and invaded the earth
And now the people are saying that that's more than you're worth
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6. |
We're All Frogs
04:05
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WE'RE ALL FROGS (Words and Music - Robert Childs)
The world is a festering cesspit swamp
Society's the slime that we're swimming on
They chop off our legs and feed us to their dogs
They open our bodies because we are frogs
We're all frogs
We're all frogs
We're all frogs
We're all frogs
We dive into drains, we live in their sewers
In order to hide from their scalpels and skewers
Our bodies preserved, which they gape at agog
It's formalin-justice because we are frogs
We're all frogs
We're all frogs
We're all frogs
We're all frogs
They study our habits, monitor our coitus
They treat us like rabbits and they try to exploit us
We leap into ditches, we hide under logs,
We suffer oppression because we are frogs
We're all frogs
We're all frogs
We're all frogs
We're all frogs
Limnodynastes tasmaniensis,
Litoria tyleri or L. wotjulumensis,
Rheobatrachus that lives in the bogs,
Bufo marinus - Yes! We are all frogs.
We're all frogs
We're all frogs
We're all frogs
We're all frogs.
|
||||
7. |
I Apologise
02:23
|
|||
I APOLOGISE (Words and Music - Robert Childs)
I come home sometimes
So full of anger
And all I do is criticise
I know how I hurt you
I never mean to
Lady I apologise
Sometimes I put you down
With a look of disdain
My contempt undisguised
I have ny excuses
For treating you that way
Lady I apologise
Many of us
Hold too much back
We find it hard to explain
Our lives pass
With little done
We smile and hide the pain
But then you tell me
You're feeling lonely
And there's that look in your eyes!
I haven't told you lately
How much I love you
Lady I apologise
Lady I apologise
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8. |
Living In a House
06:54
|
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LIVING IN A HOUSE (Words and Music - Robert Childs)
There were all those splits and fights
Days of anger and heavy nights
We were all doing our best to express
All that frustration and loneliness
The Fabulous Four at Centennial Hall
Dylan and the Band at the Palais Royal
Karl Marx and Mao Tse Tung
Ginsberg chanting at the Town Hall with his harmonium
Our fathers tried to draft us
We disobeyed them and the media laughed at us
I can't recall everything that was done
I can only perceive what we've become
Living in a house at West Lakes
With a catamaran and a colour TV
Living in a Spanish villa
With a Japanese garden
A Monstera
And a rubber tree
Shocks to the system, blows to the heart
The big build up and the tearing apart
Condemning the world from Victoria Square
With desperate words and songs of despair
The heroes and villains on our monochromes
Assassinated in our three bedroom homes
We watched in amazement at the visions of gloom
From the edge of the grave to the man on the moon
Elements of con and the supersellout
The obscenity of life and death so clearly acted out
I sit here numb, I can't move my feet
It seems so obvious who suffered the defeat
Living in a house at West Lakes
With an automatic kitchen and a colour TV
Living in a Spanish villa
With a Japanese garden
A Monstera
And a rubber tree
Meditating in the midst of a storm
Three a.m. embraces on a moonlit lawn
Levels of consciousness, layers of truth
Transcendental arguments washed down with vermouth
We sat in a circle and held each others hands
We tried to change our lives with our alternative demands
The rain fell upon us and the bitter winds moaned
As we divested ourselves of everything we ever owned
Naked ideals beginning to wake
Caught with a power as the ground began to shake
I don't know what I feel, I can't even ask how
To learn the truth about where we are now
Living in a house on the Gold Coast
With a bedroom of possessions and a burglar alarm
Living in a Mexican ha?enda
With a bottle of tequila
And a coconut palm
There was hate in my heart and a fear in my gut
As the wind blew behind me. My defences were cut.
Here I was just another fat calf
Solving everything with a cynical laugh
I tried to stay cool, I tried to stay out of view
I closed my shell on people and quickly withdrew
I sat here alone and never said very much
Drew back from that reality that I dared never to touch
With too much kidding and too little thought
There I was convinced that I could never be bought
So was it a surprise when I had noone else to blame
And I finally discovered that I was the same
Living in an old farmhouse
Watching all the neighbours build their redbrick shrines
Living in a kind of suburb
With bigger backyards
And fewer powerlines
The neighbours come in and the neighbours go out
They keep to themselves their roles never in doubt
Maybe you can see them there washing the car
Free from depression and paranoia
They're daily routines completely mapped out for them
From indescribable contentment to irrepressible boredom
Maybe you can see them out there in the street
Keeping their values distinctly discreet
We look out our windows and the neighbours look in
Their faces familiar, their destinies grim
We look in our mirrors and the neighbours appear
We can hardly suppress "What am I doing here?"
We lie in our beds while the wind blows our drapes
And we try to distinguish the many fugitive shapes
We lie in our beds, roll over and fart
Living in a house that's falling apart
Living in a house at West Lakes
With a pair of silver shoes
And a washing machine
Living in a state of anaesthesia
With a Ficus decora
And the disco scene
Living in a house
Living at a bend
Living in the world
Following a megatrend
Living life so breezy
What fool ever said
Life was never meant
To be
Easy?
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9. |
||||
REVENGE OF THE TEENYBOPPERS
(Words and Music - Robert Childs)
I am 14, going on 12
I am totally concerned with myself
I'm the same as any other adolescent
Omnipresent, pubescent and incessant
I hate you
Why don'tcha give me all you've got
I'm so free
Why do you tie me in a knot
Gimme a wine
And another gobstopper
This is the Revenge
Of the T-T-T-Teenybopper
There are rules teenyboppers observe
Demand as a right what you don't deserve
Behave unreasonably, always deride
Fight continually, belch with pride
I hate you
Why don'tcha give me all you've got
I'm so free
Why do you tie me in a knot
Gimme a wine
And another gobstopper
This is the Revenge
Of the T-T-T-Teenybopper
Teenyboppers bounce off the walls
Teenyboppers smash through the doors
Up and down the chimneys, up and down the stairs
Teenyboppers invading everywhere!
The jungle of birth, the desert of life
Spawns the ancient sacrificial rite
Elders on the altar of the new Stonehenge
Mutton to the slaughter - Teenyboppers Revenge
I hate you
Why don'tcha give me all you've got
I'm so free
Why do you tie me in a knot
Gimme a wine
And another gobstopper
This is the Revenge
Of the T-T-T-Teenybopper.
|
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10. |
Yours Sincerely
04:10
|
|||
YOURS SINCERELY (Words and Music - Robert Childs)
Dear Kate
I masturbate
And I think I'm going blind
I swing on the chandeliers and peer into the lights
And nothing seems to be unkind
Those thousand watt bulbs are hot to the touch
But my sister makes me go on and on
I remain your frustrated and confused
Big Brother John
Dear John
I remember you
I picked you up when I was twenty two
You were nice and warm and good for a laugh
But right now I suggest you take an ice long bath
There are so many things a young person can do
If you persist I'm sure you'll pull through
If this doesn't work blame your mother but clear me
Yours sincerely
Kate Sempreri
Dear Kate
Am I too late?
Last night I had this heavy scene
My boyfriend came kissing my shame
Kate, the thrill was so obscene
I think I'm pregnant but I don't know for sure
Please tell me Kate I need an instant cure
I'm helpless and desperate, I just don't know how to go on
Signed our desperate lover
John
Dear John (my son)
I remember you
I picked you up in the zoo
You were in the monkey cage with an elephant
You looked so romantic with that tropical plant
I know a surgeon who can give a cure
But the most important thing is to always think pure
You can always count on me, dearie
Yours sincerely
Kate Sempreri
Dear Kate
I'm thirty eight
And I think I'm going mad
My lover is unfaithful, my ten year old daughter's on the pill
And I've passed the best years I've ever had
And now my sister's writing in the national press
What I think's an obscene and pornographic column
I don't think I can take very much more of this
Your Concerned Parent of Eight
Father John
Dear John (I'm getting warm)
I agree with you
I'm thoroughly sickened by the things that people do
Let's swing into action let's show people we can see
Uphold the family and the monarchy
I can understand your life is like a kettledrum
(Haven't you ever heard of Valium?)
Please write again and don't fear me
Yours Sincerely
Kate Sempreri
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11. |
Sixshooter Serenade
02:37
|
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SIXSHOOTER SERENADE (Words and Music - Robert Childs)
Ahm gonna be a cowboy with a price on ma head
Ahm gonna hold up a bank n shoot the customers dead
Ahm gonna ride outa town n fill the sheriff fulla dread
M sixshooter cn take awl the fame
Ahm gonna hold up a stagecoach with a sword off shotgn
Ahm gonna rob all the wimin ntil ahm sure that they're undone
Ahm gonna get me sm finery n have me sm fn
M sixshooter cn take awl the game
Ahm gonna get me a filly n filler full a hot lead
N when shealays down besida me ahm gonna go back to bed
Ahm gonna be a famous cowboy n a great movie star
Ahm gonna own a lil island offa Madagascar haha
Ahm gonna play ma guitar beneath the stars n letya awl know who ah are
M sixshooter cn make it awl the same
But ahm afraid that ahve fergottn ya name
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12. |
Jesse Presley's Lament
03:53
|
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JESSE PRESLEY'S LAMENT (Words and Music - Robert Childs)
You had all the breaks
You had all the luck
You were the king
With a big hunk o' bucks
A home on the boulevard
Worldwide fame
A good ol' country boy
In gold lame
Heartbreak Motel
I can hear you dying
Heartbreak Motel on the radio
Heartbreak Motel
I can catch you,
watch you suiciding
Heartbreak Motel on the video
The desk clerk's in the swimming pool
And the switchboard shut at nine
The FM country station
Resumes its subtle whine
Can't stop this eating emptiness
I can't help getting fatter
I've been so long on loneliness
It doesn't seem to matter
Heartbreak Motel
I can hear you dying
Heartbreak Motel on the radio
Heartbreak Motel
I can catch you,
watch you suiciding
Heartbreak Motel on the video
Fear and loss
Destiny and Fate
That echo in the body
That I impersonate
Perhaps we're in heaven
Perhaps we're in hell
Or perhaps we've turned to dust
And brother that's just as well
But in some possible world
In some freezing motel room
I can watch the life and death
Of our dear mother's womb
Heartbreak Motel
I can hear you dying
Heartbreak Motel on the radio
Heartbreak Motel
I can catch you,
watch you suiciding
Heartbreak Motel on the video
|
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13. |
On Their Way To God
03:25
|
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ON THEIR WAY TO GOD (Words and Music - Robert Childs)
In the name of the Allah
In the name of the Lord
In the name of the Buddah
In the name of the Virgin
In the name of Jesus
In the name of Jehovah
In the name of Mr Jones
From Jonestown, Guyana
They're On Their Way To God (x 4)
They worship their Madonnas
They practise their hymns
Chant their superstitions
And enunciate their sins
But the sin of omission
In which noone ever delves
Is their own mortal sin
Of not believing in themselves
They're On Their Way To God
Say a prayer for the Saviour
Put a bullet in the child
Say farewell to the devil
To keep the pact of suicide
They're On Their Way To God
Sackcloth and ashes
Damnation and hellfire
Self flagellation
Until the day they die
If it's a question of creation
Their answer's quite odd
Who could put their faith
In a Man-created god?
They're On Their Way To God
|
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14. |
Adios Amigos
03:49
|
|||
ADIOS AMIGOS (Words and Music - Robert Childs)
You see that man down there, Pancho, riding the stagecoach
They say he's the President, but he's a cowboy just like us
He's riding the stage into that blind ravine
He's headed for an ambush, there's a gun at every rock
You and I know we're the good guys, fighting evil men
Restoring law and order with our trick shots and lassoos
You and I know we should warn them, but the stage has gone too far
So there's nothing we can do - just remount and ride away
Adios amigos, see you soon amigos
We're heading for the mesa where the mountains touch the sky
Adios amigos, see you soon amigos
We'll see you on the delta by and by
You see out in the distance that trail of ragged warriors
Loaded up with weapons that could destroy the cavalry
You see that band of soldiers with their carbines and their gatling guns
They're following that crazy man - there's going to be a war
Once we would have mounted our paint and palomino
Once we would have settled this without a smoking gun
But you and I have grown old, and our aims no longer true
So, Pancho, listen very well as we ride into the sun
Adios amigos...
You see that wagon train with its fine ladies and kind gentlemen
Searching for horizons they've been promised by that man
He's sold them a tale about prosperity and happiness
But they're headed for the desert and the edge of no man's land
You and I are old, my friend, and our horses very weary
Many years ago we might have saved them from their fate
But the night is coming fast and the distances impossible
Saddle up, Pancho, because you know it's too late
Adios amigos...
|
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15. |
Call The Police
05:43
|
|||
CALL THE POLICE (Words and Music - Robert Childs)
Your safety is due to a big man in blue
I learned that from my drinking cup
I know it must be true because a big man in blue
Arrested me and locked me up.
He said it was for my own protection
And how can I doubt his word?
My momma told me all about law and order
And this is what I heard
Chorus
Call The Police
Call The Police
I know I'm asking for the world
But I just want some peace
Call The Police
You're made to feel a fool when you break elementary rules
You'd like to rip'em up and start again
But you're kept back inside to learn the rules of homicide
With a cut to the back of the hand.
The temptation is short, the crack of shattering chalk
Is the only whimper heard.
Life can be fine, it's a wavering line
That's rubbed out on the learning curve.
Chorus
The first rule I learnt was to never get burnt
By the hellfire family
Who fill you with hope in their visions of utopia
And chain you to your misery
But if you try to kill the children of evil
With their heads full of ideals and dreams
The mafia in your mind whispers it's a crime
And the demon in your spirit screams
Chorus
And all I want to do is just indulge myself
And all I want to do is just indulge myself
And all I want to do is just indulge myself
It's for your own good the images harped
In their visions of the fruits of life
It's for your own good the voices in me chanted
As I indulged my family and wife
It's for your own good the man in blue said
As they dragged me through the doors of the cell
They meant that much to me I just had to set them free
As their lonely voices yelled
Chorus
And all I got to do is just indulge myself
And all I got to do is just indulge myself
And all I got to do is just indulge myself
The mind police control you
The heart police attack
Image police dispense disease
Like a nymphomaniac
Memory cops can shoot on sight
Planning cops can maul
But the fashion squad
They think they're god
And they're the worst of all
Call The Police
Call The Police
I know I'm asking for the world
But I just want release
Call The Police
Call The Police
I know I'm asking for the world
But I just want relief
Call The Police
Call The Police
I know I'm asking for the world
But I just want some peace.
|
||||
16. |
||||
I CAN'T BEAR TO TEAR MYSELF AWAY FROM YOU
(Words and Music - Robert Childs)
We could stay this way forever
Our arms and legs entwined
Skin to skin upon a naked bed
oblivious to passing time
We could stay like this together
Locked in each other's clasp
Sealed inside our loving, yearning
Bodies sticking fast
Chorus
I can't bear to tear myself away from you
The pain a simple kiss creates
The agony as our flesh separates
Stick us both together
With a rubber band
And a dab of glue
I can't bear to tear myself away from you
I could find the trail on your skin
That leads me to your past
Hand in hand revealing
Each one's ever changing path
You could find the roads we travelled
And the rivers we've explored
We take that stream of memories
In wave on wave of more
Chorus
I was thinking of the time we met
It's an intimate photograph
The glow of your affection
The warmth of your loving laugh
I was thinking of the time we've spent
The pleasure and delight
The captivated ache of lovers
Moaning in the naked night
I was looking through the window
Listening to you sigh
I thought that you were sleeping
With your hand upon my thigh
I thought that you were sleeping
When I heard your loving call
Lip to lip and eye to eye
And bound to each others soul
Chorus
|
||||
17. |
Rock'n'Roll Cover Band
05:53
|
|||
ROCK'N'ROLL COVER BAND (Words and Music - Robert Childs)
That's enough original music
That's enough selfindulgent rhyme
The promotor says he knows
What's best for his shows
The people just want to have a good time
If you want to get a better audience
You have to play what the people know
They don't want to hear it
It if they haven't ever seen it
Playing on their videos
Chorus
I play casinos
I play the front of the hotel bars
But I only sing songs
That were written by people
In England and America
And I'm paying off a secondhand Rickenbacker bass
Which I'm learning to play left hand
In my Fifties, Sixties, Seventies, Eighties
Rock'n'Roll Cover Band
First I play a rock'n'roll medley
Then the latest hits of sixty nine
Only three chords
And one syllable words
Which I slur with a rockabilly whine
My agent says I'm doing fantastic
It's just what the audience needs
And he's dressed me for the night
I look absolutely right
In my floral shirt and hippie beads
Chorus
Bridge
I had a song of my own
So I gave it a try
But my manager took me aside
Demanding why, why, why, why, WHY
My manager rang up my agent
Who spoke to an A&R man
Nothing is final
But there's a chance of vinyl
And maybe aluminium
But my publicist says I need a bunch of new songs
She knows just to whom she can talk
So my repertoire is coming
All the way from London
Except the ones who come from New York
Chorus
I play the Beatles
I play Elvis Presley and Stones
Abba and Soul
Even Billy Joel
As long as it's nothing of my own
And I'm paying off a secondhand Rickenbacker bass
Which I'm learning to play left hand
In my Fifties, Sixties, Seventies, Eighties
Rock'n'Roll Cover Band
Coda
Please please me (Rock'N'Roll Cover Band)
I want to be your man (Rock'N'Roll Cover Band)
Please release me (Rock'N'Roll Cover Band)
I want to say that I did it my way
I'm down (Rock'N'Roll Cover Band)
Way down (Rock'N'Roll Cover Band)
Downtown (Rock'N'Roll Cover Band)
Trying to get it all together now
All together now
Yeah, yeah, yeah
Yeah, yeah, yeah
Yeah, yeah, yeah, YEAH!
|
Robert Childs Australia
Robert Childs wrote his first song when he was about 10. He founded SCALA (Songwriters, Composers And Lyricists Association) in 1987. He was awarded an OAM (Medal of the Order of Australia) for his services to music in 2004 and was inducted into the South Australian Music Hall of Fame in 2019. ... more
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